Monday, January 2, 2012

I can't stand my father in law! How can I tolerate him better?

He is a flithy person, cares nothing for hygiene (he purposely let his teeth rot so that they would fall out and he wouldn't have to deal with them and could get dentures which he doesn't even bother to wear. He lets his dog sniff, lick, and eat roadkill. He beats the crap out of my sister in laws dog that she trusted to him because she's having a hard time in life and doesn't have a place of her own right now. He is reprehensibly rude and ungratful to anyone for anything. If you do something nice for him all he can do is ask for more. I try so hard to be nice to him, but he does the meanest most disgusting things all of the time. He leaves horrible messages on my answering machine that anger me so much that I just want to scream! And when I get mad at him he just brings up the fact that his life sucks and he's in a wheelchair, his wife left him for another woman...because he was an abusive pig then too. He beat all of his children, and all of his brothers are offenders (not all convicted) and I think he is too. He even madde his ex wife beat her children to save them from him beating them harder. He's just a miserable person. He just got a felony drug trafficking conviction and doesn't want to follow the rules of probation or get rid of his firearms that his friend has right now. Through all of this my husband has the hardest time even telling him off when he's a pig! He just called my house four times in a row after my husband already told him he was doing what he askedd and left two awful messages! I get that he's depressed, bitter, resentful, but he acts like a five year old that doesn't get his way--and he's nearly fifty and at least 200 pounds. Going to his house is so hard, I get angry when I pull into the driveway! He invites people to his house that he knows have stolen his prescription painkillers in teh past. He quit therapy a long time ago because 'he doesn't need it'. He is so narcissistic that it's sickening and if you even imply he may be wrong, or disagree with him, he gets violently angry and swears and yells. I take him places, take care of him, do the things for him he has a hard time doing, but he's killing me with his toxic personality! I know it's awful...I hate myself for feeling this way about a poor crippled old man whose only income is his disability social security. He makes the house so filthy. He sees dog crap in teh house and runs through it in his wheel chair and just tells me to clean it the next day. He's wreckless and is constantly hurting himself and won't listen to doctors orders. he waits until he's completely out of his prescriptions or gone days without them before telling me that he's out and needs them picked up. Jesus Christ, I'm going insane! How can I tolerate this behavior, how can I treat him nice when he treats me so badly? He's gross...I make suggestions about hygiene, I try to keep him clean and presentable. He won't shave...he only brushes his hair if he's going somewhere and it's down to his shoulders...he won't cut or shave it off and it's matted and hard to handle. In a few months he's leaving the state to live with his daughter...is it wrong that I can't wait? I feel so bad.

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